Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Journal #14: Declaration of Awesome

I am now going to write out the Declaration of Awesome. Now I myself am a pretty awesome guy, ask anybody. This declaration defends my being awesome and proclaims that nobody in the world will ever achieve the same level of awesomeness because mine is exponentially higher than their scores of awesome. Everything I do is awesome. My taste in music is beyond awesome, as is my taste in literature and my taste in film. Really I don't even have to write this declaration because the level of awesome that I am is so high that everybody knows of it. Ask somebody in freaking Tibet about me and they'll know! That's why this declaration isn't even necessary because the world already knows of my level of win. But, due to this being the assignment I guess I kind of have to write this. There are numerous rules to being as awesome as I am and sadly nobody else in the world can even come close to achieving all of these rules and being anywhere near as amazing as I am. In fact you know how humans are made up of like 75% water and stuff? I don't obey that rule instead I'm made of 99% WIN. That's right pure unadulterated WIN is the stuff that I'm made out of. The other one percent is normal H20 but that's beside the point. My awesomeness just can't be contained and due to this I'm the most awesomest person in the world. Yeah, awesomest, you may say that's not an actually word but I say silence mortal my word is law! Some might say I'm narcissistic and egotistical but they're just jealous. They want to be me, but they know they can't so they spread dirty filthy terrible rumors about me to try and bring down my awesomeness and that' s just not gonna happen. I'm too amazing, so sorry but that's how it goes. I am awesome.

3 comments:

  1. Wow, Dylan, you need to tone the egotistical knob down and the modest and humility knob up, way up. Some of us are not jealous of you or your so called "awesomeness." So please just calm it down.

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  2. You are full of yourself. This blog has very poor writing style. If somebody reads this they are going to get mad because it is really really annoying. I was getting mad. It is annoying. And you have made up words. That is all.

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  3. Funny blog entry - interesting how written word can evoke such emotional responses.

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